I Was Told There’d Be No Mustaches In This Administration

When President-elect Donald Trump was forming his cabinet former UN Ambassador John Bolton’s name was bandied about for Secretary of State, but that nomination never materialized because he reportedly had an issue with Bolton’s white mustache.

President Teddy Roosevelt served two brawny terms in the Oval Office.  His successor, William Howard Taft, ascended to the presidency with lower nose foliage.  Neither political party has nominated a candidate for president since Dewey challenged Truman.

“Uncle” Walter Cronkite read us the news with a mustache and we rejoiced in mustachioed Mark Spitz’s domination in the 1972 Summer Olympic Games in Munich.  The mustache’s time in the sun seems to have passed.  No more Robert Redford crumb catcher in Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid; no more lip caterpillars sported by the likes of Frank Zappa, David Crosby, Barry Gibb or Freddy Mercury.

Washington Post reporters Phillip Rucker and Karen Tumulty revealed that part of the President-elect’s methodical searches for cabinet officials included seeking what he deemed to be an appropriate “look.”  Was there ever a more dynamic mustache than that of Hollywood heartthrob Clark Gable?

When Bolton wasn’t nominated he showed his facial hair militancy by vigorously declaring:

I appreciate the grooming advice from the totally unbiased mainstream media, but I will not be shaving my #mustache.

— John Bolton (@AmbJohnBolton) December 22, 2016

"I told him to shave that mustache prior to the interview"

~ John Bolton's PR guy #JohnBoltonsMustache pic.twitter.com/c7rvnNqEKZ

— Sean Erreger LCSW (@StuckonSW) December 22, 2016

Since Lt. Gen Michael Flynn resigned was fired as National Security Adviser on Monday amidst reports he misled Vice President Mike Pence about conversations he held with the Russian ambassador to the United States, Sen. Ted Cruz has called on the President to pick Bolton to fill that role.

“John is someone who is very well known here on the Hill. Republicans and Democrats know John Bolton well. He is someone who understands the world. He understands the threats of radical Islamic terrorism. He understands the threats of an overaggressive Putin,” Cruz told CNN's Manu Raju on Friday.

I tend to agree.  He knows where the skeletons are hidden in the Obama-era State Department and he’s a man of deep conviction.  The proof—he will not shave to get a job.